Black Moon
by AURyuichi-san
Summary: Aka- New Moon: Maddy Remix. Bella's depression over the departure of the Cullens becomes the least of Maddy's concerns when she's faced with an impossible scenario.
1. PrefaceParty

Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight series.

* * *

 _Ah Love! could you and I with Him conspire_

 _To grasp this sorry Scheme of Things entire,_

 _Would not we shatter it to bits-and then_

 _Record it nearer to the Heart's Desire!_

The Rubáiyát of Omar Khayyám, Edward Fitzgerald, _XCIX_

* * *

PREFACE

I never realized how difficult it would be to be so far from _them,_ almost as difficult as it was to be away from my beloved Jasper; as emotionally painful as it was to have physically brought them into my life. More than the separation, though, it was the _fear_ that threatened to consume me in its entirety. Fear of the Volturi discovering _them_ too early, fear of Edward finding out through one slip.

No longer would it be so easy for me to throw myself into danger for the sake of my family. It was hard enough to resolve myself when it was only Jasper I had waiting for me. Now that I had _them_ as well, there'd be no justification I could convince myself with to put myself in life threatening danger if I could help it.

Of course, if a life with the Volturi or a death by their hands meant _they_ would be safe, then I would do it, despite such an option being completely unthinkable before.

At this point, it should be obvious that I would do _anything_ if it meant ensuring _they_ live and I knew, from looking into Jasper's own determined gaze, that he felt exactly the same way.

* * *

1\. PARTY

As Bella had put it so well in her own thoughts... _I was ninety-nine point nine percent sure I was dreaming_.

Reason one being, most obviously, that I was a vampire, from what I could see of my pale marble skin and ridiculously luscious hair. Reason two being that I was wearing a terribly familiar looking charcoal gray cloak that I'm sure I didn't own, having fallen asleep in my usual nightwear of a soft long sleeve shirt and grey sweatpants. The final and most obvious reason being that I was sitting comfortably in the lap of a red eyed vampire who was _not Jasper_.

Like, _what the honest ever living fuck?_

Anyone under the sun who knew us _knew_ that both of us were disgustingly in love with each other. The Forks town gossip circle even unanimously voted us the most in love young couple of said small town (the most in love adult couple being Carlisle and Esme.) As such, it was unthinkable to _anyone_ , myself included that _either_ of us would be something as _ludicrous_ as _unfaithful_.

Hence the conclusion that this was a dream, or rather, a terrible nightmare considering from the parchment like quality of the vampire's skin, his milky red eyes, and the hateful glare I was getting from a loli-vampire in a slightly lighter gray cloak nearby, that the vampire I was sitting on was likely Aro of the Volturi. Granted, the two thrones on either side of us holding vampires with similar qualities was also a rather big hint...

I reaaaallly hope that this was just a stress or junk food induced nightmare and not a glimpse of a possible future I was receiving via dreams because that shit just wouldn't fly with me. I'd die before I joined Aro's sick group of sycophants. That or rally an army under Jasper's command, kill them all, and take over completely. Either, or. It depended on which would work best in the situation.

" _Madeleine_ ," the pained, guttural call of my name jolted me violently from my musings in the dream as it was delivered by a terrifyingly familiar voice, one so intimately imprinted in my memory that I could mistake him for no one else.

There, forced on his knees by faceless guards, looking all too much like I imagined he would coming out of a vampire battle, was my beloved Jasper, a look of utter exhaustion, defeat, and resignation in his flat black gaze. And yet even underneath all the horrifying markers on him of a war lost, he still managed to relate to me all his adoration, love... _acceptance_.

His own name stuck painfully in my own throat, sure I'd be choking on it if I were still human. I was shouting at myself in my mind, unable to move my limbs, horrified that I wasn't trying to _help him_.

He only looked up at me with warm, sad eyes, exposing a torn, ravaged throat and I idly wondered how he was still able to speak at all, both of us ignoring the multitude of vampire guards that lunged for him at a motion from Aro.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

* * *

"NO!" I choked near soundless as I lunged to a sitting position, arms outstretched to grasp something that wasn't there. From the periphery of my vision I could see the light, nebulous sky that was a typical Forks morning, but I was more focused on calming my chest from the ravaging heaves and sobs brought on by the disturbingly vivid nightmare.

 _Fantastic_ , I thought. _I could have done without sharing Bella's propensity for intricate, freaky nightmares._ Why did she have to taint our twin bond with this crap when all she got from me was happy fun times? And why couldn't there be an office I could file complaints to for this distasteful lack of equal exchange here?

I checked the time and date on my cell and groaned, my head flopping back onto the pillow.

 _September 13- 3:49am_

I blinked when I felt a cold hand on my clammy cheek, cool fingers brushing away strands of hair uncomfortably pasted on damp skin.

"You alright, kitten?" Jasper asked in concern, handing me a glass of water, his usual clear smoky, gravelly voice helping to settle me down a bit, so blessedly different from the alien tone I'd heard from him in my nightmare. "That felt like a bum* dream."

I took a grateful sip of the offered glass, wiping away the sheen of cold sweat with a sleeve now that the fear had passed, smiling at Jasper when he curled his arm around my waist and pulled me gently to lean against him.

"Well it definitely wasn't all rainbows and unicorns, I'll give you that much."

He chuckled and put the glass aside as soon as I finished, brushing feather light kisses along my neck.

"Not sleepy anymore?" He questioned, though he could likely answer that better than I could.

"No," I replied, petulant. "Entertain me!" I demanded, like a spoiled child would.

Jasper only chuckled again and actually began to sing.

" _Happy birthday my darling,_

 _And many, many more_  
 _Another year had passed,_  
 _And I love you even more_

 _Your eyes I love to see,_  
 _Your hair I love to touch,_  
 _Your lips I love to kiss_  
 _I love you oh, so very much_

 _Tomorrow starts a new year,_  
 _And memories put away_  
 _I want to say I love you,_  
 _Darling, happy birthday_

 _The gift I have for you_  
 _Is a promise to be true_  
 _To love you through the years_  
 _And never ever bring you tears_

 _Tomorrow starts a new year,_  
 _And memories fade away_  
 _I want to say I love you,_  
 _Darling, happy birthday_

 _The gift I have for you_  
 _Is a promise to be true_  
 _To love you through the years_  
 _And never ever bring you tears_

 _Tomorrow starts a new year,_  
 _And memories fade away_  
 _I want to say I love you,_  
 _Darling, happy birthday"**_

"Jazz," was all I managed to rasp out, a hand clutching at the material over my chest and eyes watery.

"Now don't go makin' me break one of my promises already," he teased softly, a thumb brushing over a still dry cheek.

"Stupid," I muttered, "tears of joy obviously don't count." I sniffled and wiped away the few tears of utter adoration I shed from the touching lyrics sung with the voice of a god. "Goodness, Jasper, I'm already unquestionably yours. No need to _romance_ me with such _intensity_."

"You deserve to be _intensely romanced_ ," he purred, chest rumbling as he angled my face with a gentle hand and pressed marble lips to mine, the contrast of sensations, as always, sending an invigorating tingle through my body.

"Happy birthday to me," I smirked in pleasure, licking my lips of the sweet taste of him, setting Jasper to laugh huskily in amusement.

We cuddled the rest of the morning before Jasper reminded me to get ready for school. A change into a black crop top with too-long sleeves, ripped skinny jeans, and leather heel boots-* - plus my usual darkish makeup(smoky eye shadow, mascara, wing eyeliner, & black lipstick)- and I was ready to go.

Jasper had just closed the passenger door behind me, chewing the last of my breakfast bagel as I buckled my seat belt, when my cell vibrated once. I wasn't nearly as surprised as I would have been half a year ago when I saw it was a happy birthday text from Rosalie.

"Rosalie?" Jasper questioned as he gracefully slid into the driver's seat.

"Rosalie," I affirmed with a single nod, smiling back at his amused smirk as he caught her massage on my screen:

' _Happy birthday, bitch.'_

It was another welcome highlight of my morning after the nightmare I'd had and the unholy hour it had forced me to wake up at.

The school day passed entirely unremarkable, especially with Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmett no longer attending, and it wasn't as though anyone save Angela had wished me or Bella a happy birthday as they didn't even know when it was. This was completely intentional on both Bella and I's part, if for different reasons. Bella, obviously, is just reticent to the extreme while I simply don't care to thank every nameless acquaintance for wishing me a happy birthday and pretending to be pleased with the few unfitting gifts some may have given me.

I was hardly going to follow common(unnecessary) social practices if I could avoid them entirely. Angela didn't count with her quiet well wishes and sweet gift of homemade sweets and a knitted scarf. The poor, innocent girl flushed deep when I practically glomped her in the hallway. Am one hundred percent sure that if I wasn't going out with Jasper, they'd think I was in love with Angela. I am also about eighty-eight percent sure they'd be right. Jasper believed it'd be a hundred, but what did he know?

Bella obviously dreads anything festive, even her own birthday, but I was actually looking forward to having a proper birthday party for the first time since we were kids. Bella being the shy downer she was didn't exactly have much in the way of close enough friends to invite to birthday get togethers after elementary school and I only had a lot of _casual_ friends that wouldn't like idea of having to buy _two_ presents, one for the quiet girl they don't really know so I never bothered to tell anyone my birthday or hand out invitations either.

The three, sometimes four, person birthday get togethers we had as a family were enough. At first it was just birthday dinner favorites and ice cream and cake for dessert with presents from Renèe and Charlie, but I got bored with that real fast(not that it's not sweet or appreciated) when we _could_ be doing fun things like going to amusement parks, zoos, arcades, etcetera etcetera and _then_ getting the family dinner and presents. But no, because Bella no likey fun. It was a very serious allergy.

One unfortunate side effect to being a twin with Renèe as your mother was that she believed the idea of getting twins matching presents too cute to pass up, no matter that she knew we were very different and very much individuals. This was also one of the only times she directly contacted Dad so they could 'coordinate' their gifts. Poor awkward Charlie went along with it without resistance at first since he had no idea what to get two little girls, but after I started hanging out with him in the summer(Bella sulking in her room doesn't constitute for much father daughter bonding), he realized that we're different people and may not appreciate getting matching gifts.

Of course, he couldn't exactly _argue_ with our stubborn, single minded mother so he settled for going along with her matching gift thing _and_ buying us small individual gifts. This year we were each given a scrapbook from Renèe and a camera from Charlie, but Charlie also got Bella a warm, pretty coat and hunted down for me a signed copy of one of my favorite books.

At lunch I cornered Bella, knowing she wished to avoid this from the expression of dread on her face at seeing me approach. Her attempts to move Edward and her to a different table than usual were an effort in futility. I may not eat lunch with them anymore, but did she really think she could escape a seer? Especially when her vampire boyfriend was on _my_ side for once(and wasn't _that_ a novelty in itself.) The fact that Bella seemed to unconsciously deny my gift as a seer and cling to the unfounded belief that it couldn't be that powerful or special or accurate was irrelevant.

"We'll be expecting you at the Cullens no later than seven, Bell-Bell," I announced cheerfully, getting a scowl in return.

"Inviting yourself over again? Unlike some I actually have to work."

Wow, just wow. All this because I don't have her useless sense of shame when it came to spending time with my lover's family and them spending their money however they want on me? Rude. My smile became more fixed as I tried not to reminisce on how many of our shared birthdays she's spoiled with her overly irritated, moody attitude.

"Mrs. Newton wouldn't make you work on your birthday, silly! She's trading your shifts and told me to wish you a happy birthday!"

Bella flushed angrily at what'd I'd done, but knew nothing would come of my actions no matter what she yelled at me. Sometimes she was actually smart enough not to fight losing battles.

"I still can't go," she began to hastily deny.

"Don't worry! Your deadline of seven leaves you plenty of time to procrastinate by watching that one _Romeo and Juleit_ movie you have yet to see for homework. After putting all that _time_ and _effort_ into thinking about you and setting this up I'm sure you wouldn't want to disappoint or upset the Cullens by wallowing in your usual antisocial tendencies. After all, they want to celebrate your birthday with you _like a real family_ -"

"I get it! I'll go!" Bella snapped, upset, face red in shame and anger. "But I don't appreciate being obviously guilt tripped into this!" She scowled.

I only smirked in grim satisfaction, mood already spoiled since this morning. "It's obviously something you needed since you certainly weren't going to think of _their_ feelings and efforts on your own. Now you can suck it up and maybe act a bit more grateful that they actually _care_ despite your many faults."

"You say that as if you don't have more personality flaws than I do," she snarked back coldly.

"Everyone has flaws, Isabella, I've always believed that. The difference between you and me is that I've never acted as if I have no flaws at all." Rather than get into a bigger argument, I decided to just walk away. With the last word, of course - that was always satisfying.

To both Bella and my relief, we successfully avoided each other and further talk of our birthday for the rest of us school day. My mood notably lifted when Jasper was ready and waiting after the last bell rang and soon had us speeding to his house, more so than usual.

"What's the rush?" I asked Jasper. I'd learned the hard way not to rely on my gift to answer every question since the visions turned more personal. Damn my strong curiosity for making me a slow learner in that regard.

"I figured you'd want as much time as possible to decorate just right," Jasper replied easily.

" _You_ guys are the ones that are going to be doing all the manual labor and with your super mach speed, it shouldn't take more than ten minutes tops," I scoffed, a smile lifting the edge of my lips.

"Ah, but you're a perfectionist, little dove. You'll be directing poor Emmett and I with orders of 'A little to the left' and 'just a little more that way' while Rosalie, Carlisle, and Esme watch on indulgently." Jasper nodded solemnly in agreement with himself.

"Well...you're not _wrong_ ," I laughed, unable to totally deny it.

Jasper's eyes only softened as he gazed at me laughing, stopping my breath short at the sudden flush of warmth his expression evoked in me.

"What is it?" I smiled shyly at him. Jasper was always good at catching me off guard, throwing me off balance, in the best ways.

" _To feel you so effused with joy_

 _To see its beauty adorn your face_

 _Brings me a sentiment of love ineffable."*-_

His recitation was flawless, his tone bone melting in its quiet intensity and I found myself relating greatly to the last line. ' _Brings me a sentiment of love ineffable_ ,' indeed.

"Who wrote that?" I asked, voice shaky and low from holding back a more emotional response.

"An old soldier by the name Jasper Nathan Whitlock did, about his lady love," he replied, just as quiet.

"Jasper, you..." I had nothing to respond with, far too touched to think of anything to say at all.

"I didn't lie about not being one for poetry," Jasper started, "but, Maddy, you inspire me to do things, _be_ things, I never thought I could. You let me feel like a person, made me more a man than I ever have been, and a better one than I ever believed I could be. Your love has altered my immutable existence, in a way I refuse to reject or reverse."

I barely paid attention when the car stopped, Jasper cupping my cheek with a gloved hand so gently I felt as fragile and precious as colored glass.

"You are my life now," Jasper pressed his cool brow lightly against mine, noses just brushing together, "my joy, my peace, my love. Every day I spend with you is a blessing and today, all the more, I thank whatever God responsible for your existence that you were born and allowing me the chance to find you, to love you as you deserve."

Jasper pressed a firm, chaste kiss on my lips.

"Thank you, Madeleine. _Thank you for being born_."

Before I could so much as sob in response to Jasper's emotive speech, the passenger door was opened.

"What the hell, Jasper?! How are we supposed to top your disgustingly romantic birthday well-wishes now?" Emmett cried indignantly, unbuckling me and clutching me in his arms like a delicate doll and shielding me from Jasper as if he were a criminal.

Jasper was out of the car and standing in front of Emmett, growling, before I could properly blink and take in my new position.

"Emmett," Jasper growled in annoyance and mock anger.

"If I hand her back, will you actually let her go inside? Everyone's kind of waiting."

Obviously Emmett had been the most impatient. Moment thoroughly ended by his meddling, I could only sigh and remind myself to revisit the moment when we were properly alone.

"Put me down, Emmett, we'll go inside now."

The next breath, I was in Jasper's arms instead as he easily made his way to the front door. The surprise came when I opened the door.

"Happy birthday, Maddy!" The loud chorused greeting and the party poppers raining confetti was not unexpected. The black, red, and gold streamers, balloons, candles, and roses decorating their huge living room, however, was very much unexpected. There was a table with black cloth draped over it by Edward's grand piano, displaying a mouthwatering assortment of small, gorgeous brownie cakes with varying toppings of powdered sugar, fudge, chocolate flakes, strawberries, raspberries, and chopped nuts, more roses, a small chocolate fountain with fruit to dip in it, and a sizeable pile of presents wrapped in gold with black or red ribbons.

I loved it. It looked my ideal birthday party decoration. But...

"We did this for _you_ , Maddy. Just you," Jasper told me, brushing a kiss over my warm cheek. "We can clean up and decorate for your sister in three hours before she comes over, but for now we're celebrating _your_ birthday."

I sniffled and swallowed back the tears threatening to fall. "You guys are super awesome," I managed to voice with minimal croaking.

Rosalie flipped her hair, the others smiling. "Of course we are," she sniffed as if I'd stated the obvious. Which, honestly, I totally did.

"I know presents usually go last, but I think you'll want to take your time looking through them than rushing because you're worried of running out of time to clean up everything," Jasper murmured as he set me down and led me to the presents.

"But - but, _chocolate,"_ I whined piteously, whimpering low in my throat when he moved me past the table of delicious goodies, pulling my hands back with a chuckle when I weakly reached for a brownie.

"You'll clean off the table soon enough, darlin'. Try enjoyin' your presents first."

"Oh! Oh! Me first!" Emmett lifted the largest wrapped present which was obviously a treasure chest from the shape and making me wonder why he bothered wrapping it before I remembered who I was thinking about. Of course he did, he's Emmett.

I snorted when he waggled his eyebrows, and pointedly made a show of taking out black cropped satin gloves from my back pocket and putting them on.

Rosalie scoffed when Emmett gave an exaggerated pout of hurt as I tore off the gold coin wrapping paper, the others chuckling at our dramatics. Humor was always a good way to mask more serious reasons. No need to reenact Bella's original birthday disaster.

I raised a brow at Emmett when I saw the keyhole in place of a lock or latch, inwardly very pleased and impressed at the dark leather, classic looking, treasure chest. He grinned and handed me a very large, very fancy looking gold key. My breathing stopped when I took in the weight of it.

"Please tell me this is not made entirely of real gold," I pleaded faintly.

"It's not made entirely of real gold," Emmett replied dutifully.

"Don't lie to me," I hissed.

"Well, do you want the truth or what you want to hear?" He retorted cheekily.

I groaned and put a hand over my eyes, trying to come to terms with the ridiculous thing I held in my hand.

"Just don't think about it, Maddy," I muttered in encouragement to myself as I unlocked the chest, ignoring the muffled laughter of my audience. I gasped at discovering the contents.

In the chest was a Cruella de Vil paradise; an assortment of rich, supple furs and leathers, treated to perfection.

"What..." For the second time today I was speechless.

"You're the one who told us that just burying the animals we suck dry was wasteful. Rosalie and Esme already have their own collections to do what they want with."

"You guys are seriously trying to make me cry, aren't you?" I huffed as I teared up again, lifting a ridiculously soft, large bear fur to my face. It hardly smelled at all, no _gross_ smells at least.

Don't get me wrong, I am completely against hunting animals solely for their fur, but the Cullens had to hunt to live and while I honestly wouldn't have cared if they fed on humans, it was their choice to be vegetarian. What I _did_ have a problem with was them just burying the poor things after draining them of blood. It's not like they didn't have the time or means to learn how to use all of it to some effect, whether to use or sell _somewhere_. I just found it a bit disrespectful to discard their bodies like that and they obviously didn't mind my opinion if this present was any indication.

"You're welcome," Emmett grinned smugly, obviously quite pleased with himself.

"Yeah, yeah, move over Nimrod, it's my turn," Rosalie shoved a sputtering Emmett away, ignoring when he sulked, and handed me a smaller rectangular chest. When I ripped off the gold filigree wrapping paper it revealed a dark stained wood chest with a golden latch and a beautiful rose design carved on the front.

When opened its cream satin-lined contents revealed an intricate black, gold, and white 18th century ball gown encrusted with hundreds of little crystals and gems I couldn't even pretend weren't real considering who it was from.

"I know how much you like historically accurate clothes pieces. This is just one of a whole wardrobe of clothes I made or bought from around the world for you to play dress up with Jasper," Rosalie smirked. I knew that meant I had a new collection of lingerie through the ages to match somewhere.

"Does that mean Jasper has a dress up closet now too?" I asked.

"Of course! What's the point of my gift if it's not a matching set?" She replied haughtily.

"May I go next?" It was Esme's turn to carefully hand me a present wrapped in gold damask paper. It was heavy and _felt_ breakable so I opened it carefully. I swallowed loudly at the sight.

It was a sizeable jewelry box of gold metal and stained glass with a gorgeous black and violet swallowtail butterfly design on the lid. Inside was an assortment of delicate, elegant jewelry pieces of varying gems and metals.

"I designed everything for you myself," Esme confessed shyly. Jasper easily put the gift aside so I could hug her with all the meager strength I could muster.

"It's a priceless gift, Esme. I'll treasure every piece," I whispered shakily.

"I suppose it's my turn," Carlisle mused, handing me the smallest, lightest gift so far wrapped in gold feather patterned paper. Ripping the paper revealed a luxurious black leather scrapbook embossed with Celtic designs and inside...inside were what could be nothing but the legitimate pages of sketches of Leonardo da Vinci and Vincent Van Gogh interspersed with sketches drawn by Carlisle himself of landscapes and scenes lost to history, forever changed by the modernization wrought from progress.

"I...I have no words," I choked out, rubbing my eyes before the tears could fall.

Jasper handed me my last gift, heavier than Esme's in my lap, a box wrapped in pretty crumpled gold foil paper. Out of the box I struggled to lift an octagonal chest made to look like dark stone, a lying dragon carved on the top and surrounded by gothic designs. Lifting the lid made my limbs numb with shock. Were it not for vampire reflexes, my gift would already require a replacement lid. Inside the cushy lined box was an embarrassment of riches; gems, crystals, and precious metals. All of them curiously egg shaped though of varying sizes. A handful of certain sizes were set in rings, bracelets, or necklaces but the rest were simply egg shaped treasures, many of them different kinds of opals.

I burst out laughing at recalling how I'd told him months ago my favorite gem and why.

"You- you got me dragon eggs for my birthday!" I managed to breath out between hysterical laughter. Apparently, he'd told the others why he'd gotten her such a strange gift since they laughed with her. "I cannot _believe_ you guys!" I huffed as I wiped away tears and stared at their gifts, overwhelmed.

Just guessing at the insane value of their individual gifts was liable to give me a heart attack and I somewhat understood why Bella was so mortified at the idea at getting crazy expensive gifts, but rather than needlessly worry about skewed reciprocation(healthy relationships are not about giving expensive material objects or favors with the expectation of getting another material object of equal value), I was just more frantic at how easily they spent their money or gave away invaluable objects, but that only meant I hadn't understood the true scope of how immaterial the Cullens wealth was to them.

A small part of me wanted to protest, but the bigger part of me knew I was aiming for forever with Jasper so it'd be better for me to adjust to their expenditure, at least, before I marry into their coven and turn because the way they use money is not going to change anytime soon with how much of it they probably have as a coven, nevermind individually.

"You like it," Jasper gave that heart-stopping roguish grin.

"That's the biggest understatement I've ever heard," I mock scowled. "How the hell am I supposed to top this with the future presents I give you all?!" I demanded. "Shocking and awing people silent is supposed to be _my_ thing," I complained.

Of course, they all laughed at me.

"Should we take back our presents, then?" Carlisle offered, humoring me.

I literally hissed at him like a pissed cat and hoarded Jasper's heavy gift closer to me, as if to shield it with my body.

"How dare you suggest such blasphemy?" I whispered as if he had spoken the most horrendous sin, the most unspeakable insult anyone could imagine.

Jasper coughed into one hand to poorly disguise his laughter. It would have been fairly convincing if I didn't know vampires didn't need to cough, or even breath.

"Relax, mama dragon, no one's gonna try to take your presents," Emmett was the one laughing the loudest. "Seriously, though, you're _hilarious_."

"It's a gift, really," posing like a diva, tone full of pomp. A few moments of silence was all I could take before the temptation was too much to resist. "Can I eat the chocolate buffet now?"

Honestly, with how easy, how often, I made the Cullens laugh it was hard to see them as these paradigms of perfection, as these all mighty immortal beings beyond human understanding. The way Bella described them, they seemed like an asshole race, but I refuse to believe anyone with a stick up their ass can have such a bright, healthy sense of humor.

 _Monsters, they say._ Please.

"So I heard your sister's procrastinating her arrival by watching Romeo & Juliet," Rosalie commented, idly spinning a white rose between her fingers.

"Ye~s?" I stretched out the word, wondering where she was going with this.

"Well, I just happen to set aside some matching 14th century clothes downstairs. I think there's enough time to play out maybe one scene from the play ourselves, say...act II scene I?" Rosalie suggested none too subtly.

I couldn't help the excited grin that took up half my face while Jasper grimaced beside me.

"I am _not_ wearing tights," Jasper immediately refused. While I wouldn't push Jasper into wearing tights for my sake(or at all, ever), I was disappointed at not being able to act out one of the play's most famous scene with him in full costume.

"Relax," Rosalie brushed aside his worry and my disappointment easily, "I touched up your costume so it's not too colorful or frilly, and no tights," she promised.

"Then I see no issue with getting dressed for our roles," Jasper smirked. I squeaked when he suddenly picked me up and ghosted me away to his rooms. In the open space of the living room were two dressed mannequins that obviously shared our body measurements and were dressed in the promised upper class 14th century costumes I could easily imagine in a Shakespearean play.

"Best birthday ever," I whispered, sniffling a bit as I gently ran my hands over my Juliet outfit.

"And to think," Jasper moved to press himself to my back, wrapping his arms around my waist and pressing a kiss to my head, "It's not even over yet."

* * *

By the time Edward and Bella arrived, all my gifts were safely stowed away in Jasper's car to be taken back to my house, along with my sweets, and my personalized decorations were switched with Bella's own. Far less grand than her own, considering Bella's utter lack of festive spirit regarding anything, the streamers and balloons were gone, the many candles and roses switched out with only a handful of yellow and white candles and a bowl or two of pink, yellow, and white roses while the black cloth of the table had been replaced with a white one and on it were displayed a gorgeous yellow rose frosted cake, more roses tastefully placed, a stack of glass plates, and a small pile of silver-wrapped presents.

Despite being _very_ toned down from my own decorations and the 'canon' ones as well, Bella still looked upon them with a, frankly insulting, look of utter anguish. The mood firmly set by that one expression, the Cullens became reserved, cautious, treated Bella as though she was glass. I wish I could say this was something new, but it was hardly that. Bella had always held the Cullens(Edward included) to some higher standard because of what they were. While it was great that she didn't look down on them or vilify them as irredeemable monsters, glorifying and romanticiszing them to being something more than 'merely human', 'perfection incarnate', honestly wasn't much better in my opinion.

In the end, being vampires didn't make them less 'people' than they were when they had been human. Of _course_ being turned had changed them, down to their species, but that didn't mean they didn't stem from the same roots as everyone else; a mother and father, a family, a life. Their turn only meant a significant life change, obviously more severe and more difficult to handle than most humans would ever have to deal with, but still similar enough to other situations to be relatable, not close to wholly alien, and it wasn't something that couldn't be _overcome_. The Cullens were proof enough of that. Maybe they weren't completely whole anymore, broken as they were by events in their life that couldn't be stopped or prevented, but it's not like humans were much better. I'd consider it more rare to find someone who hadn't been broken by life at one point or another(what sheltered, privileged, lucky little shits.)

Anyway, the point was, thanks to Bella's weird inferiority complex and her skewed perception that vampires were the pinnacle of evolutionary perfection(I mean, _honestly_ ), she had this very _obvious_ , very _awkward_ attitude/behavior towards them that was only worsened by her usual stubborn petulance and misplaced sense of obligation and shame towards most things. She thought the Cullens were these distant, perfect beings and she an insignificant human, not realizing it was she herself placing this insurmountable obstacle between them with her unsubtle behavior.

Not that the Cullens entirely minded, they were far too used to various human reactions for them to mind Bella putting them on pedestals, but that didn't make it _alright_. Not that _I_ was doing anything about it. Why would I, with how stubborn and 'I know I'm right' Bella usually is? Hopefully, she'd understand the more time she spent with them and that she'd be used to it soon - preferable _before_ she was tur-

" _Madeleine!_ " My eyes snapped to Edward who was standing in front of me with a brown paper and twine package in his hand, his gold eyes narrowed at me.

Jasper gave a low growl in response to the slight provocation, inaudible to me if I hadn't been pressed back to his chest to feel it. The exchange was nothing new when we were around each other. Edward would snoop in my idle thoughts, hear something he didn't like, frown in disapproval in my direction and I would respond by scowling or sneering back while Jasper openly glared, hissed, or growled at his little brother to back the fuck off. Boys, honestly.

"You say something?" I asked, seeing how it looked like he'd been trying to get my attention for a bit and only raised his voice a bit when my thoughts got too unsavory for him.

"I'd been informed you already opened the rest of your gifts, and decided it best to present mine." He smiled teasingly at my sister who was pressed to his side, expression resigned, "and give Bella a little more time to delay the inevitable."

I took the gift with no little amount of caution and opened it slowly, carefully. I gasped at what lay inside.

"I-is this..." I stammered, seeming to amuse Edward greatly as he smirked at me tauntingly.

"A signed first edition of The Satanic Bible? _Yes."_

All the vampires winced when I suddenly squealed with joy, hugging the gift to my chest. "Thankyouthankyouthankyou!" I hopped up and down, too ecstatic to keep it in. "I can't believe you found this! Do you have any idea how much I wanted this?!" I was happy enough to feel a little lightheaded with the emotion.

Jasper, ever attentive to my moods, placed a cautionary arm around my waist.

"You...actually like it?" Edward murmured, entirely baffled.

"Of course! Didn't I mention these were the kinds of books I read when I first talked to you guys at school? I thought that's why you got it for me."

"I thought you were joking!"

"This was supposed to be a gag gift!" I laughed. "Either way, it's awesome! Thank you!"

Edward only sighed in, dare I say, _fond_ exasperation and responded. "Your real gift is waiting on a shelf in Jasper's rooms. It's a vintage collection of books on Myths and Legends from around the world."

"Really, Edward, thank you," I told him sincerely. "They're wonderful, thoughtful gifts."

Jasper gave another, sudden, inaudible growl. Judging by the narrow eyed look he was giving Bella and her own weak 'uncaring' look, she had been jealous of the gifts her boyfriend had given me, despite claiming to not want any gifts at all.

I _was_ surprised to see that Edward briefly squeezed Bella's arm in a way that could be construed as both placating and a warning to behave herself.

"Well!" I clapped my hands together after carefully setting aside the precious book. "Now that Bell-Bell's here, it's _her_ turn to open presents!"

Bella poorly hid her grimace and squared her shoulders to 'bravely' approach the small pile of presents - with a discreet nudge from Edward obviously.

"Oh!" Bella paused from where she was reluctantly reaching for the closet package, the others all turning to look at me as well. "Mine first! Here!" I all but shoved them in her hands, admittedly a bit anxious.

Bella looked wide eyed at the item in her hands. It was only a pair of leather gloves, though they were of nice quality; thin, smooth tan with ridiculously soft lining.

"Try them on!" I urged with a bright smile.

"Why? You know they fit so it's pointless. Besides I'm about to open the other presents," she argued with a small frown.

"Then just open the presents with them on," I insisted with an impatient huff. "I want to see how they look on you!" I threw out an excuse, hoping she'd just _listen_ to me for once.

"For what?" No dice. "They're just gloves. And with your _gift,_ you should already know how they look on me."

"Can you please just put them on for at least the next ten minutes?" I asked in frustrated exasperation, biting the inside of my cheek when I obviously leaked out too much frustration in my voice when Bella narrowed her eyes in suspicion at me.

"Why are you so insistent on this?" She demanded. "Did you have a vision or something?"

I felt a purposeful, strong jab at my meager human mental defences then and unwillingly a snippet of what could have happened slipped to the forefront of my mind before I shifted my thoughts to inane things. But the damage was done, it was too late to stop him from seeing-

"Jasper nearly kills Bella over a paper cut?!" Edward growled loudly, angrily as he was suddenly in a defensive crouch before her.

I glared incredulously at Edturd for what he just blurted out while everyone else froze, Jasper himself looking quite pained from what he'd just heard.

"Emmett, punch Edward," I demanded with icy calm. The next second, Edward crashed to the ground from not one but _two_ punches to the head. Seems Rosalie decided to use the opportunity as well.

Only another scant second passed and Edward was back on his feet, glaring daggers at Rosalie, Emmet, and I and growling non-stop.

"Did any of you ever even consider just how deeply Jasper's gift affects him?" My voice soft with restrained fury.

"How do you mean, Madeleine?" Carlisle asked, equally cautious and curious.

"It seems to me that you all only believe in the most basic definition of his abilities, that being someone capable of feeling emotions that are not their own. But it's far more than that," I hissed before physically restraining myself and taking a deep breath to calm down a little. "Rather than emotions, what Jasper can sense are _feelings_ , a small but incredibly significant difference."

"I don't get it," Emmet said loudly. "Aren't they the same thing?"

I took another deep breath, unable to believe that I had to explain this to vampires decades older than me. Hadn't any of them ever taken even a basic psychology class? Carlisle must have, right?!

"Emotions are generally classified as concepts like joy and sorrow, love and hate, pleasure and anger. _Feelings_ can describe those emotional states but they also cover _physical ailments_ ," I explained slowly, as if to dimwits. "Feeling sick; dizziness, nausea, pain. Feeling tired; being numb, sore, sleepy. _Feeling hungry_."

Ah, at last my lecture seemed to be clicking.

"To feel the hunger and thirst of hundreds of humans on a regular basis might not be so dire as human feelings don't seem as strong to you as your own kind, but a coven of vampires whose diet has them in a constant state of unsatisfied thirst..." I trailed off as the dawning horror eclipsed all their faces, quickly morphing to deep awe and respect as they turned to a stunned Jasper.

"It's beyond a miracle that Jasper hasn't snapped once since he joined us!" Emmet blurted what they were all likely thinking.

"No, it's thanks to Jasper's incredible control that he hasn't," I refuted strongly. "You all praise Edward for not losing it over his singer, for seeming to have more control over his thirst than even Carlisle, but Jasper has to deal with not only his own thirst but Edward's and the rest of yours as well. Almost 24/7." I couldn't help but turn a frown onto Carlisle. "I can't say I'm not upset that you especially never noticed this, Carlisle. You are meant to be their coven leader their _father_ , but in this case, in both respects, you have failed Jasper."

Bella sucked in a sharp breath at my calm reprimand, the vampires not breathing at all, shocked silent by my recriminations.

I merely waited to see who would speak first into the stunned quiet. I wasn't at all surprised at who it turned out to be.

* * *

 **AN:** I'm aliiiiiiive! Relax, my peeps. As long as I'm not dead, I would never leave you hanging! I should probably warn you again that I am horrendous at keeping deadlines. Truth be told I already had around 5k written by the time I said I'd update(which was sometime in March, I believe?), but I just couldn't find the will to eke out those last 2k words to wrap it up. And ending it on a cliffie! Not my intention since I'm not that great at them but just turned out that way, hope you don't mind as I don't know when I'll update next, lol!

I _am_ sorry about taking so long, though I don't think it was as long as it took me to update between chapter 8 and 9 of the first book(I think it hit almost two years or more before I added ch 9 and kept going), but life and depression like to sucker punch me in the gut. I recently got a new job, then another one(two jobs) a month or two later and only recently got used to the early hours and lack of free, relaxing me time. Upside is that it fired up the muse in me to write as a way to escape reality! So hopefully you'll be seeing the next chapter before the year is over(I've learned better than to make promises at this point.)

Anyway! On to the story notes!:

*I'm just referring to 'bum', unnecessarily bringing attention to Jasper's use of slang from his human years because I always feel like it's awkward or forced the few times I sneak it in there and feeling the need to explain myself...

**I can't find this on tumblr and my YouTube isn't working so just...look up Happy Birthday My darling- Carl Smith on YouTube if you're really interested in what it sounds like?

-*her outfit, as usual, will be on madsper dot tumblr dot com for those interested

*-Jasper's poem is actually an original work, so, you know, I mean, I'm the one who wrote it. Hope it's not too terrible... ,°(~,~)`•

I sincerely thank all my loyal readers for their utmost patience and hope I have done your expectations justice. As always, thank you for reading my story and reviews are most welcome. Until next time!

,(^o^)/


	2. Stitches

Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Series.

* * *

2\. STITCHES

"There are no words I can use to properly convey how...how _aghas_ t I am at failing you so spectacularly." Carlisle was not looking at me at all, for which I was glad since I was trying to reign in that little snap of temper. "Jasper, _I am sorry_."

Jasper wasn't exactly in a state to answer, still stunned silent by the sudden revelation of the reason behind his centuries of struggle with a vampire's most base instinct.

"We are all at fault in considering you weakest when it came to controlling your thirst when Madeleine was indeed correct about you being the strongest of us all...and that I am the most culpable for not realizing this myself sooner." He stepped closer to Jasper then. "I know this is no excuse and I do not intend to try and justify my deplorable blindness to your situation. After all you've gone through, you deserve a better coven leader than I."

"No, Carlisle-" Jasper cut off, quick to deny his chosen leader's self recriminations but equally unsure how to continue. He didn't get a chance to gather his thoughts though as Esme was suddenly attempting to crush him with her embrace.

"Oh Jasper, I'm so sorry!" Esme warbled unsteadily. I was sure if she could, she would be bawling her eyes out right now. "How could I not realize how much you were suffering all this time!" She sobbed audibly then, though her eyes remained detestably dry. "My baby's so strong!"

"Esme..." Truly, Jasper was very much out of his element. Even now, decades after leaving behind the southern vampire wars, my Jazz was still very unused to all this unconditional love and support - and I know he adored them all the more for it.

"If that's true, then why didn't he ever tell anyone? Couldn't he tell the difference between his thirst and someone else's?" Bella cut in to the touching family moment, not even addressing the thoughtless inquiry at Jasper but at me. "And besides that, what made you think it was your place to talk to their dad like that?" She criticized harshly.

For a breathless few moments, I literally could not formulate a coherent thought from the mix of shock, anger, mortification, and _hurt_ at my sister's outburst.

"What makes her think it's _her place?_ " To my surprise, it was Rosalie that spoke up in my defense, voice deceptively soft. " _She's our sister_."

A blind, emotionally inept turd could tell how much a slap to the face those three words were to Bella from the involuntary jerk back she did, face falling dramatically and looking incredibly hurt - as if she had a right to, as if she were the victim. _Honestly._

"From day one, all Maddy's been concerned about is keeping our secret and making sure we'd be happy - without even caring about her own secrets or safety, the stupid bitch," Rosalie's voice continued to grow louder and louder. "And from day one she's been defending the disgusting behavior you've had towards her since you moved here, always telling us how you were different, how you were closer and a good sister before coming to Forks!" She was practically shrieking now. "And frankly, I'm sick of hearing her fucking excuses for your fucked up behavior! If Maddy didn't still love you so much despite being a sorry excuse for a human being, I'd have popped your stupid bobble head off your body the first opportunity I got!"

"I told you you're not touching a hair on Bella's head or I'd rip yours off!" Edward growled furiously, crouching half defensively in front of his singer.

"Try it, you dickless wonder!" Rosalie hissed back. "If that _thing_ didn't share relation with our Maddy, then I would have killed her for the danger she posed to our family, never mind your sick fascination with her!"

"When are you going to get over the fact that I think you're as physically appealing to me as a crude blow up doll," Edward sneered nastily in return.

I gasped loudly at that, scandalized in equal parts by the tasteless insult coming from stick-up-his-ass Edward as I was by him insulting Rosalie so horribly at all. Seriously, _what the fuck?!_

As expected, Rosalie shrieked in unholy fury and had leapt to attack Edward but was held back by Emmet's firm grip, though he was sending Edward quite the furious, murderous scowl for the insult towards his lovely mate.

"Enough!" Carlisle half growled, half shouted in command. I was pretty amazed when they really did stop instantly, looking like guilty, though recalcitrant children as they turned to him. "Edward that insult was entirely uncalled for and you will apologize immediately!" He reprimanded, sounding very much like Charlie when he caught me being especially rude to someone.

For a moment Edward looked like he wouldn't comply, but then-

" _Edward_!" Carlisle barked sharply, looking angrier than I'd ever seen him. Edward's expression fell into a sullen frown, slumping tense shoulders as he rose from his defensive crouch.

"I...apologize Rosalie. I realize that my last statement was taking things too far," he offered stiffly, but at least he sounded sincere and appropriately repentant. A subtle glance and returning nod from Jasper told me it was, in fact, sincere. Huh. So Edward could actually _learn_? Interesting.

"And Isabella..." he looked to the very pale, shaking sister of mine. "Rosalie could have put it much more nicely, and perhaps kept a few of her personal opinions to herself, but," he looked her squarely in the eye, face firm, "we do consider Madeleine _family_. She truly has become an irreplaceable support to us and while I understand that it is not _my place_ to tell, or even advise, you on how to treat your sister, I would like to ask that you refrain from...speaking to her in such a way when we are near. Please."

Bella shrunk in on herself, beet red from mortification and shame as, while Carlisle's delivery wasn't angry or scolding, his gently taking her to task seemed more effective than a harsh reprimand.

"I'm sorry," she apologized readily, tugging self consciously at her sleeves. "This...this is kind of all my fault anyway. "She mumbled. "Maddy was only trying to stop something worse from happening. If I wasn't so clumsy -all over a stupid papercut - I'm sorry."

Carlisle's gaze softened and he smiled warmly at her. "You shouldn't apologize for being human," he returned kindly. "It would have been no one's fault. We can't help what we are."

"still...maybe it's better if I go home for now?" she half asked hesitantly. "Not that I don't really appreciate all you've done for me and everything!" Bella was hasty to add. "This was all really nice and I can't wait to open all my presents, but -"

"We understand, dear," Esme interrupted her nervous babbling, smiling kindly at her. "Oh! But let me wrap up your cake so you can take it home with you!" Esme was gone in the next blink, the cake with her.

Bella left with a few more awkward thank yous, goodbyes, ill hidden relief, and a nearly tangibly reluctant nod in my direction before being willingly shepherded away by Edward back to home.

A short, thick period of silence had me incapable of _not_ saying something.

"Well, this is awkward," I delivered in perfect deadpan.

Emmett broke first, snickering loudly and breaking the tension that had built from the moment Bella walked into the room. In a blink, they turned from a distant coven of cautious supernaturals to a warm, close family of unique individuals - Carlisle and Esme smiled warmly, Rosalie sneered and flipped her hair while Emmett cooed adoringly over her, and Jasper visibly relaxed from his battle ready posture - the very air around them seemed to have melted into a comfortable, more intimate setting.

"I should probably head out, too," I excused myself far more naturally. "The time it takes to give my own goodbyes will probably be enough for Bella to be holed up in her room by the time I get back."

And so it was.

* * *

"We're ba~ack," I sang with my creepy horror movie voice as I grandly opened the front door. Chuckles erupted from both behind and in front of me as Dad had come to greet us at the door.

"You, uh, you and Bella came home early," he started awkwardly. "And it looked like she was sulking about something?" He couldn't help the amused grin that tugged at his lips when I made a _face._ "I take it something happened?"

"Yeah, 'something' happened, alright," I muttered, but not quite sure what to tell him. Turns out I didn't need to since Jasper stepped up.

"Maddy arranged a modest party for Isabella and tried to offer subtle assistance on how to minimize her admittedly frequent bouts of clumsiness - to not ruin the mood," Jasper started.

"Bu~ut," Dad drawled, obviously having an idea of where this was going.

"But Isabella grew suspicious and, I'm sorry but in my opinion, overreacted and responded in what I thought was an unnecessarily rude manner to Maddy's well meant intentions," Jasper reported grimly. "I'm afraid Rosalie didn't take kindly to that and shouted which in turn got Edward to defend her, leading to them fighting and - well, needless to say our father shut them down and disciplined them. I hope you don't mind, but he ended up giving Isabella a bit of a scolding as well since her attitude towards Maddy was the trigger, more or less."

"Well, I know your father is a good man, level headed," Dad started slowly, reluctantly. "If he thought Bella deserved a little bit of a talking to then it was likely deserved, and considering the scene you set and her past record involving her and Maddy, I can't really say it's that unbelievable..." He rubbed harshly at the side of his neck, face scrunched. "From the looks of it, Bella's mortified enough so it's probably best I just, uh, ignore it entirely. The situation is pretty much resolved, yeah?" He asked Jasper half hopefully.

Jasper nodded firmly. "Fights are pretty normal in our family. They start as fast as they finish and Carlisle has no issue with Isabella. I said scolding but it was more like a request for more civil behavior around each other at least in their presence."

"Good, uh, good to hear," Dad cleared his throat awkwardly in the small silence that followed. "Soooo... everything is okay then - at least, you know, mostly?" His eyes darted to the stairs where Bella no doubt trudged up not so long ago.

"I suppose," I drawled uncaringly, only to smirk a little, "at least it won't be any more awkward than usual around here," I finished, pointedly eyeing Dad with a raised brow. He couldn't help huffing out a laugh at that, his tense shoulders finally relaxing completely.

"Ha ha," he replied dryly.

* * *

"Something on your mind, Jazz?" I asked, falling to sit back on my bed as he quietly shut the door. "You were quiet the whole ride back here."

Wordlessly, Jasper settled himself on the ground in front of me, hands running lightly from my knees and up my thighs until they settled loosely on my hips.

In response, I gave him a bright, playful smile as I casually wrapped my legs around his middle and crossed my ankles. His returning smile was stupidly dazzling.

"Since the moment you came into my life, you have shattered every preconception I've had about my very existence," he started very solemnly, stealing my breath from the beginning of what I could tell is a long speech. "The belief that no one would fall in love with me," he kissed my tummy. "The belief that I would never be good enough for them if anyone did," he kissed the cloth between my breasts. "The belief that I could never change for the better," he kissed the hollow of my collarbone. "The belief...that my turning and ability made me the weakest link in my chosen coven." He kissed me firmly on the mouth.

"I love you," he whispered fervently. Another firm kiss. " _Te amo_ ," another, " _aishite imasu,_ " another, " _tha gr_ _ádh agam dhuibh,_ " another, " _saranghamnida*_." A much longer, deeper kiss this time. "There will never be enough words, enough ways, in the human language to express what it is I feel for you," he finished just as solemnly as he began, forcing a shuddering breath out of me.

"Fuck you and your shamelessly excessive romancing bullshit," I croaked out unsteadily, trying to blink away my teary eyes but only succeeding in making a few drops streak down my cheeks. "How fucking dare you turn me into this emotional sobbing mess," an actual sob warping the middle of my sentence as if to demonstrate my point.

After the first statement, he had blinked in startlement before he - I assume - assessed my emotions and slowly began to grin, only to break out into unrestrained laughter by the end of my response.

I wasn't ashamed to say that his laugh had honestly short circuited my brain then. There were plenty of things he did that accomplished much the same(most sensual in nature), but until this point, never him laughing. It was very clear to me why. Never, in the inordinate amount of time we've spent together - alone or in company - had Jasper ever laugh so freely, so _openly unapologetically happy_. He was practically radiating with elation and considering exactly what his ability was, I had no doubt that his mood was _literally_ infectious as I felt my own love and excitement and joy bubble and crest in my chest in an attempt to match his.

He wiped at the half dried tears that were already itching at my cheeks with cool thumbs, feeling unbelievably nice on my heated face as he caressed my features.

"You made me break my promise already," he said as his laughs turn to chuckles. He smirked then. "Don't worry," he assured, "I forgive you."

Automatically I smacked his shoulder at the smartass response, laughing shakily and pouncing him, burying my face in his chest.

"You're learning waaay too much from me."

* * *

It was the sound of hushed urgent whispers and the lack of a cold body beside me under the heating blanket that had my brain trying pathetically to wake me from deep slumber. It couldn't be earlier than the asscrack of dawn from the way my lids refused to unfuck my eyes.

"An adorable puppy named Cottonball better be stuck down a fucking well," I rasped hoarsely from sleep as I reluctantly pried open stupid heavy lids and blinked from how stupid painful the action was.

"That's oddly specific," Emmett commented, stepping closer to my bed. "Is that the only reason you'll accept or am I gonna have to do a lot of sucking up to make it up to you?"

"Oh, there'll be dickload of sucking up and pandering to my whims regardless for forcing these blasphemous hours of consciousness on me," I hissed as I sat up as slowly as a senior citizen from a chair.

"Your words are kind of slurred when your sleepy, it's funny," was Emmett's only reply.

"Yeah? And unicorns like sucking faerie dick," I snapped, making Emmett and Jasper start snickering in disbelief. "If we're done making useless commentary; the reason for your presence here?" I demanded more than asked, a bit more awake but still unbelievably cranky.

"Now I don't know if I want to tell you," he teased.

"Emmett," Jasper and I hissed together, though his urging was a bit more commanding and exasperated than deadass tired and cranky.

"Alright, alright!" Emmett huffed, holding his hands up in mock surrender, though his grin was anything but repentant. Of course I straightened and woke completely when his usually playful grin dropped completely and he looked me straight in the eye. "You need to come back to the house."

* * *

 **AN:** Hello all! Surprisingly as tentatively not-promised I finished the next chapter before the end of the year! Admittedly, it was mostly because the chapter itself was shorter than I expected, but I think it was good. Just saying now, sorry but don't expect the next chapter before the end of the year. I may have switched to just one job when they offered me more days, and the pay is better because of tips but it's still this daily juggle between work, mental issues(fuck stress), and self care, and holidays - especially December holidays - make everything crazy busy both at work and in personal lives.

Anyway! As always, thank you for reading and feel free to leave reviews! And a special thank you for your utmost patience and understanding. (✿´꒳`)ﾉ°

 ***** \- I know, I know; Jasper being disgustingly romantic, but I can't help myself... saying I love you in a bunch of different languages was a sappy cliché I couldn't resist. In order of language it goes English(obviously), Latin(I wanted to go for the root language, but it's the same as Spanish and similar to Italian, again obviously), Japanese(their culture actually doesn't say it often since they prefer expressing love through actions not words-romantic idea in its own right), Scottish Gaelic(this one I'm a bit iffy about but it says it means I love you in the romantic/affectionate sense so I used it, but if I'm wrong you can tell me), and Korean(the most formal way you can say it in their language). Jasper being the utterly devoted sap he is obviously took it upon himself to thoroughly familiarize himself with everything Maddy likes- meaning he looked into her favorite reading material, anime, k-dramas, etcetera and learned everything he could about it all(he happens to share her love of historical k-dramas and manga in particular.)


	3. The End

Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight franchise.

Warning: Bit of kinky lemon in this chappie. Just a bit. Feel free to skip if it's not your cup of tea.

 **((#0x0#))** {Lemon start indicator)

 **((#=x=#))** {Lemon over)

* * *

3\. THE END

It honestly felt like I had walked into total pandemonium - and there were only really two people arguing; Rosalie and Edward, obviously. Both Carlisle and Esme were trying to calm them down but they weren't very effective and now that Emmett had returned to champion Rosalie it was even louder. From the bits and pieces I could gather between their alternatively too-fast/human-speed shouting, they were fighting over Edward's sudden, firm decision to pack up and leave Forks for good. Without Bella or I tagging along or staying in touch.

Seemed to me that preventing Jasper from nearly killing Bella did nothing to change his dumbass course of action, just the knowledge that it could have happened being enough for him to chicken out. Edward sent me a dark glare at my thoughts, getting one from Jasper in return, but did not stop his heated argument with the others. Curiously, Jasper remained quietly at my side, taking no sides though he glowered sharply at Edward for every scowl the boy sent my way when he read a stray thought of mine he didn't like.

From the snippets I caught between their varying talking speeds, Carlisle respected his star childe's decision to leave with said star childe's stupid ass reason that he no longer wants to endanger Bella with their proximity and Esme was torn between understanding Edturd's reason to leave and believing they and Jasper and I belong together. I was touched when I pieced together that Rosalie was arguing to stay _because of me_. Sure, there was a lot of derision towards Bella and insults of Edward's intelligence in her arguments, but the point was that she'd rather stay and be close to me than away in some misguided attempt to keep us safe. Emmett was obviously on Rosalie's side though he did mention how he thought I was too cool to ditch which was touching in its own way.

Well, while listening to them was fascinating and all, I did kind of wonder why they bothered to call me back to listen to this.

"And why did you bring her here as if she has any say in this?" Edward neatly brought me into their little discussion with a hiss, obviously responding to my thoughts. I blinked, a bit unprepared to be brought into the fold but also amazed that he could ask that question with such conviction.

"Right, Maddy has abso-fucking-lutely nothing to do with your decision to rip Japer and the rest of us out of her life and pretend as if we never knew her," Rosalie echoed my thoughts in a more vicious, disbelieving tone. "Are you fucking serious?!"

"Rosalie, there is no need for such vulgarity," Carlisle sighed heavily, "and Edward, she is correct in that Madeleine should have her own say in this, especially taking her gift into account, never mind her attachment to Jasper seeing as you've taken Bella's attachment to you out of the equation as well."

I gaped at that last part of Carlisle's statement _(sick buuuurn!),_ watching in awe as Edward honest to fuck _jerked_ as if someone had stabbed him, but still remained stubbornly resolute in his dumbass decision. I was taken aback mostly because I'd never heard Carlisle say something so sharp, especially with his usual calm, rational delivery.

"Madeleine?" Carlisle's address brought me back to the current issue. "Do you believe we should stay or go?"

And then the coven's intense focus was on me, Edward's gaze notably more *ehem* hostile than the rest. So I opened my mouth and said honestly -

"I think you should go -" ah, return of the pandemonium.

They didn't even let me finish and they were already all trying to shout over each other.

"Enough!" Carlisle barked, calling them all to silence again. "Please continue what you were saying, you won't be interrupted again," he said, casting a warning look over his coven.

"Look, it's obvious that once an idea gets into Edward's head he absolutely will not let it go and I completely respect that his desires take precedence over what I or my sister want, especially when you can understand his reasoning. And for as much as you've accepted either of us into your circle, we aren't _truly_ one of you and I respect that as well. Honestly, I know that you and Esme were especially pleased when you believed Edward had found his 'one', so to speak, but I've always had my doubts on whether the two staying together was really good for either of them in the long run. Maybe after you've all...left Bella will finally open her eyes and see that her relationship with Edward wasn't, uh, or isn't something she'll never get over," I finished as delicately and politely as I could without outright saying that I honestly thought they had a horribly unhealthy relationship with each other.

The reaction among them that surprised me the most wasn't their shock at my taking Edward's side(that was to be expected), but that Edward himself seemed more sincerely hurt and preoccupied with my personal beliefs about his relationship with my sister than he was with the matter at hand and whose 'side' I chose.

"Then it's decided," Edward rasped out a bit hoarsely, visibly pulling himself together, face morphing to an indecipherable mask, "we leave as soon as we are able." And between one breath and the next, he was gone in the whisper of a breeze.

* * *

"Did you seriously just agree with Edturd's asinine reasoning?" Rosalie demanded hotly.

"Is Edward out of hearing range?" I returned instead.

"Why else would I be questioning you?" was the impatient response.

"I never said I agreed with his reasoning. I understand where he's coming from, but that doesn't change that he's using it as a flimsy cover for his personal insecurities," I explained patiently. "I have my own reasons for believing this course of action is for the best."

"You're telling me that you're totally okay with us completely disappearing from your life forever, with _Jasper_ just up and disappearing from your life forever, as if we never existed?" Emmett voiced his own disbelief.

"I don't recall saying you would be gone forever," I retorted lazily, raising a brow at him. I watched intently as their looks of shock and dismay slowly morphed to realization and elation.

"So we're leaving and coming back?" Emmett grinned excitedly.

"Have you seen this?" Carlisle asked me. "And if you're agreeing to let us leave at all, is this something you believe _needs_ to happen?" The good doctor being as smart as he was really made me question how he could be so dense in other areas, but I shoved the thought aside as I always did.

"In part," I answered haltingly. "Like I said, I have my own reasons but it really boils down to Edward deciding this on his own. Now that the idea's in his head, he won't let it go until everyone goes through with it so it's best to just humor him."

"Forgive me if pandering to Edward's whims doesn't seem appealing in the slightest," Rose drawled sarcastically. "You expect us to just obey quietly?!" she finished in a hiss.

"Of course not!" I huffed, suitably offended. "Just think of it as a long honeymoon or something. No one says you have to stay together the whole time you're away and Edward would hardly find it shocking if you were to do so on the basis of being too pissed off at his decision to be in his prolonged presence."

Rosalie took a deep breath as if preparing to say something scathing, but seemed to change her mind at the last second and instead let out a long, drawn out hiss of annoyance as she released it again. " _Fine_ ," she nearly spat out, "but I think this whole situation is completely idiotic."

"While I myself have some doubts regarding Edward's decision," Carlisle began slowly, "We will defer to your judgement, Madeleine. It's reassuring to know that you believe this is the best course of action for everyone involved and that our departure is not a permanent thing."

"It's actually pretty terrifying that you have so much faith in my gift and my judgement so could you, like, not?" I pleaded weakly, very much meaning what I said. "Pretty sure you just enacted Murphy's law and something is somehow going to go horrifyingly wrong now."

Carlisle chuckled and, much to my slowly growing terror, did not respond to my plea one way or another. Not ominous at all. "Perhaps it's time for Jasper to escort you home. I apologize that we had to pull you from your much needed rest and the rest of us should likely take advantage of Edward's absence to make the beginnings of our plans to depart and return. If that is alright with you?" He directed the end question to me.

"Solid plans, Doc," I saluted cheekily, getting more chuckles as I took the time to give exaggerated good night kisses and hugs to everyone present, including Jasper even though he was leaving with me.

"Good night, Maddy," they chorused eerily in sync as Jasper closed the door behind me.

"They totally did that on purpose," I muttered to myself, making Jasper himself snicker a bit.

* * *

When Jasper turned the opposite direction to my house on the main road, I began to suspect that maybe he wasn't planning on taking me home just yet. Not that I had any objections to spending some quality alone time with him and away from the two I knew were at home. We hardly got much opportunity to do so otherwise. Still, I wouldn't be me if I didn't make a comment as he drove me further away from any civilization and into the woods.

"You know, this is starting to look like the intro scene of a B-rate slasher film," I spoke into the comfortable silence we had fallen into, shattering it completely.

"Wouldn't it be a supernatural horror, what with me bein' a vampire and all?" Jasper replied without missing a beat, far too used to my rabbit trail thoughts to be much surprised anymore.

"I'm trying _not_ to reduce my life to a cringey supernatural/romance teen flick, thank you," I sniffed.

He raised a perfect brow at that. "So you'd rather a bloody, violent movie life than a sappy one?"

"What's wrong with wanting blood _and_ chocolate*?" I asked, deceptively casual.

His eyes narrowed on me a bit, "Steppenwolf**?" He questioned.

"Marginally related, but no," I grinned. "All I'm saying that there's nothing wrong with a soul mate and _action_ in my life."

His expression melted to something tender at my casually stated affection for him. "Adrenaline junkie," he teased fondly, reaching over to stroke my cheek with cool fingers.

I could only grin wider as I circled my own fingers around his wrist and cuddled my warm cheek to his palm, stupidly besotted as I was.

"So where are we going really?"

"Try to contain your curiosity a little longer, darlin'. I promise the suspence'll be well worth it."

"Did you say that to intentionally torture me or were you just being endearingly sincere?" I questioned with pursed lips, though the upward curve I felt in them likely gave away my amusement as much as my actual emotions did.

"It's the latter choice, little dove," he chuckled.

My playful grin quickly shifted to an expression of open awe as the bumpy dirt trail Jasper had sharply turned onto a bit ago evened out onto a perfect looking forest road - rich flat dirt showed clearly where tires regularly drove while a neatly trimmed strip of grass trailed along the center. The trees along the road as we drove were in a suspiciously semi-even pattern that screamed intentional design.

I barely registered Jasper's knowing smile from the corner of my eye as I sat up straighter and focused more on my dark surroundings and what I could see of the path ahead with the help of the headlights and the soft moonlight.

Lips parted in disbelief, I took in a sharp breath as I caught my first sight of what lay at the end of the road.

We stopped momentarily at a large, ornate barbed wrought iron gate framed by white stone pillars topped by sitting griffin chimerae*' of all things! Fences of matching wrought iron and stone stretched out from both pillars, disappearing into the tree lines, and making a formidable barrier of thorns and stakes. Jasper was barely spared a glance when he opened the gates with the press of a button, too busy taking in every detail I could in front of me.

Once the gates opened to reveal the polished and trimmed landscape within, the road once again changed from the forest road to one of clean, compact white dirt framed by thin strips of gravel and led to a sight that kept my mouth gaping open in shock.

"Jasper, it's a castle," I stated the obvious in a flat tone.

"Yes, ma'am," Jasper agreed, very amused as he pulled over beside a neat quarter circle of trimmed grass before a bridge that had two white stone pillars with two dragon chimerae atop them.

"Jasper, it's a _fucking castle_! With a _GODDAMN MOAT-WHAT-THE-FUCK!"_ I shouted, no longer able to contain my disbelief.

Of course, Jasper's only response was to laugh. Very loudly.

"What's a legit fucking castle and moat doing in Forks, Washington?!" I demanded, knowing I sounded almost upset, but I was fucking shocked, okay?!

"You don't like it?" He tilted his head curiously as my emotions obviously didn't match my tone, something he seemed to often find equal parts endearing and entertaining.

"Of course I like it! It's a fucking fantasy castle of kickass! I'm just a little bit curious as to how long it's fucking been here?!" I yelled, my voice horrifyingly close to hysterical at this point faced with the fucking ridiculous thing existing in front of me.

Jasper merely shrugged in the face of said hysterics, hands casually in his pockets as he took in my every reaction. "About seven months. We finished it up a few days ago. Sped up the deadline a bit to have it ready to present after your birthday."

"A few-seven...we've been together less than _eight_ months!" I cried. "My bir- _this is a fucking birthday present?!"_

"Maddy," he called quietly, snapping my attention from the giant-ass, gorgeous stained glass windows taking up the majority of the wall left of the gatehouse that served as the entrance back to him, my eyes wide with incredulity.

Wordlessly, he held out his hand and without a thought I took it, letting him blindly lead me over the wooden bridge, under a daunting portcullis and through a long hall leading to a massive, ornate arched wood and wrought iron double door with a tree and thorn design only to stop short of it and go through an only slightly less impressive smaller single door to the left.

With the flick of a switch, Jasper revealed a generously decorated antechamber that seemed to double as a sitting/coat room and looked like it came straight out of the Titanic. He walked slowly through the room, allowing me to absorb as much as I could and touch the vintage looking pieces that we passed before flipping yet more switches and taking me through another ridiculously gorgeous wood door.

It felt like I went from the Titanic to fucking Versailles. The exceedingly long, large room was all stained glass and painstakingly painted vaulted ceilings and massive chandeliers and excess luxury and grandeur that I honestly never thought I'd see in either lifetime.

My breath shuddered with jumbled emotion as Jasper quietly walked me through the long room to the end where I realized it opened into one of the four castle towers and to what couldn't be mistaken as anything but a round throne room. Directly across from the door a ways behind us and directly before us was a raised dais with a chaise throne at its center crafted from what looked like marble and silk cushion, perfectly matching the rest of the crazy fine décor in the colossal room.

Trembling, I let Jasper sit me in the center of that chaise in my black skull print oversized sweater that served as my sleepwear, a hysterical giggle escaping me as he kneeled before me like a knight before their queen and took my left hand in his.

"From the moment I first felt your emotions touch mine, my first sight of you and the way you attempted to hide your nascent feelings for our coven and I, you consumed the heart and soul I thought I had lost in their entirety. Even then when your feelings were only an echo of what you'd glimpsed with your gift, they overwhelmed me, overtook me and altered me in ways I never even dared to dream were possible. My _raison d'être'*_ , I've said before that no words can express what it is you've come to mean to me. I can only offer this in hope you'll have the mercy to spare me a hollow existence without you."

He took an unnecessary breath then as he fished a very small wood rectangle around the size of a matchbox out of his pocket, showing off his one handed dexterity by removing and pocketing the little magnetic lid to reveal what lay nestled within; a painstakingly made, intricate little ring that looked and held the texture of three intertwined branches with little berry red gems and jade green leaves interspersed between the gaps and a black round opal that looked like the night sky as its centerpiece.

"Madeleine Hannah Swan, keeper of my heart, captor of my soul, would you grace my side for the rest of eternity?"

I could feel the pounding of my heartbeat in my ears as I began to realize the enormity of what was happening, light headed and shaking even sitting down as I was. This was happening. This was real. Far, _far too real_.

Since my rebirth, my life had been like performing the second act of a play; new script and material and characters, but the same basic settings. Even becoming involved with the Cullens as I did was nothing so far out of the ordinary for me with my 'gift' and all the knowledge I had of them and their world. But this...this proposal, while something I knew was coming, suddenly shifted everything in a perspective far too clear for me to handle.

Pain, grief, misery, struggle and hardship, familial love, love for friends, mortality, the flaws inherent in human nature; all of this was what I had plenty of experience with, what I _expected_ from life in general, from the world at large. Joy, happiness, ecstasy, unconditional _anything_ (whether it be acceptance, loyalty, commitment, or love) while familiar in short, small doses were all alien to me with as long as my bliss with Jasper has lasted thus far. The level of unquestionable devotion and utter _adulation_ he often showed terrified as much as it exhilarated me, as much as my own feelings for him did the same. Why? Because this kind of all consuming love couldn't possibly exist. I'd been told all my past life to lower my impossible expectations, that I'd die alone if I held to those fairy tale standards, and I had. I'd held onto them, unable to settle for less, and I _had_ died alone neither happy nor unhappy with my chosen solitude. Even in this life, faceless strangers continued to negate this love I held as an impossible dream, of a love where I didn't have to _settle_ , an unhealthy obsession, an unrealistic outlook, that it would require compromise and sacrifice far beyond what I would be happy to give. Yet I had been living my dream for a little more than half a year and each day I woke, wondering when the other shoe would drop.

When would he realize that I wasn't worthy of him? When would I die in some poorly executed scheme of mine? When would I be abandoned for being the greedy, controlling person I am? When would cruel reality come crashing back? Because I'd been told throughout both lives that what I was living was a fantasy that never had a happy end...yet...yet even still, I couldn't help but take in the ethereal scene before me - in a throne room of undeniable splendor, a divine specimen of a man with a character that matched, and a small ring box held perfectly still in his left hand. Everything I've ever wanted, everything I'd never dreamed I could have myself, was kneeling before me, waiting for me to take it. And like the absolute moron I was, I was making him _wait_.

"I..." I swallowed loudly to clear the rasp in my voice. "I'm not even wearing shoes. Or socks," I warbled a laugh. "Jasper, I'm barefoot and have bed hair!" I laughed a little louder as Jasper melted from his anxious statue like posture and slowly began to smile. "Yes!" I blurted out, no grace or volume control, or control at all. "Yes! _Yesyesyes_!"

His own rich, baritone laughter joined my own as he lovingly slid the ring onto my left ring finger, having moved the promise ring I had been wearing to my right sometime earlier without my having even felt it. As soon as the ring was securely on my finger, I tackled him, kissing him with all the meager human strength I could muster, relishing as one arm slid securely around my waist, the other eagerly tangling in my hair.

I laughed breathlessly when we parted with a wet smack, "you built a literal castle in seven months!" I kissed him wetly again. "You filthy rich, ludicrous, _magnificent lunatic!"_

* * *

 **((#0x0#))** {Jasper POV)

"Yes! Jasper~ _ohfuckyes~"_ Unblinking, I looked reverently at the sight laid beneath me. My Madeleine on her back, glowing with sweat, modest breasts swaying erotically in tune with the fierce pounding I was giving her lush form. I knew, _knew_ , I was going a bit too roughly for humans, and my grip on her wonderfully soft waist and hips would bloom to deep bruises in mere hours, but the possessive beast inside me only found such a thought more provocative and the fresh wave of lust and arousal that spilled from Maddy's form every time my control slipped a bit more and my kisses and grips and thrusts grew more untamed only further enflamed my darker desires.

" _Faster_!" she was all but begging me to bruise her, bite her, _claim_ her as I so dearly wanted to. I swallowed back a mouthful of venom as I sped my thrusts a fraction more, relishing in her renewed gasps and shouts of ever escalating pleasure, sobbing as I kept her from tipping over the precipice with my gift, but neither allowing her passions to cool, keeping her suspended in delirious, masochistic not-quite pleasure as she begged and ached and cried for her peak.

I couldn't help as I tortured myself as well, flawlessly shifting to an achingly slow rocking and caressing her skin until she was going nearly mad, running one hand up from her generous rear end, up her chest giving her breast a passing squeeze before I wrapped my fingers around her delicate throat in a firm grip.

The sexual adrenaline rush that hit Maddy then was like a shot of ecstasy through my veins that forced a monstrous snarl from my bared teeth as she struggled to let out a gasp of pure need from underneath my palm, her pulse fluttering beneath my cold grasp, her hips twitching with the urge to buck even as I held them still. Even as I returned to pounding into her with as little control as I dared, released fraction by fraction, tested time and again, slowly, meticulously, from the far too few times we'd found to ourselves, I still looked at her in absolute wonder.

Not an ounce of fear or horror or disgust. Only a never ending well of love and trust and excitement and desire and bliss and, " _Maddy!"_ I groaned as she squeezed me with her deliciously tight, scorching hot, inner muscles the moment I thrust against her womb, the wildcat beneath me only smiling wickedly, pupils so heavily dilated and teary that I knew its memory would never fail to arouse me in future remembrance.

"I want to feel my womb drenched in your seed, Jasper," she moaned wantonly, her whole being screaming seduction and allure, a siren's call to all my innermost fantasies, whispering to all the impossible needs in me to fuck her, bite her, _breed_ her. I couldn't have lasted longer if I tried, pressing home for a final few thrusts as I poured all of myself into her, roaring in triumph over my conquest even as she cried out her own mind shattering release, her hips and my own jerking in the aftermath of our delirious lovemaking.

Pulling out, I lay beside her and watched her slowly come down from her high, wincing a bit as she forced boneless limbs around until she was pressed close to me. Kissing her damp brow, I gently lifted her in my arms and moved to take her to the en suite. A bath would help her sore muscles.

* * *

(Maddy POV)

" _Ah_ , Maddy, yesss," Jasper hissed as I slowly impaled myself on him again and again. A thrill shot through me as I took in the sight of him, completely bare, honey gold locks sticking to marble skin, and his tied wrists resting on his head even as all the muscles in his arm were more pronounced from the effort it was taking him not to simply snap the flimsy restraint and pound into me with abandon as he did earlier.

Water sloshed over the edge of the tub as I rolled my hips to grind down on him, getting a snarl that shot straight down to my womb for my efforts. Wet hands slid over his deliciously built abdomen, up his perfect chest to cup his sculpted face. As if in a trance, Jasper's lids drooped and he leaned forward to eagerly meet my lips when I leaned in to kiss him, an animalistic whine escaping him as I pulled away, having kept the kiss slow and chaste and short. The amount of control he allowed me to feel over him was an ecstasy beyond description and I bit his marble lip in reward, gasping when he bucked his hips up at my action.

I put a hand on his chest, over where his unbeating heart was, in a restraining motion. He stilled, even his breath ceasing. I felt my insides melting at his every reaction and melded our forms together, biting cold and searing heat, feathering kisses all over his chest, neck and face, ending with a sweet kiss to his lips.

"I love you," I couldn't help but sigh as I rest my head in the crook of his neck.

"And I, you," he replied softly, kissing the crown of my head and nuzzling his cool nose against the curve of my neck, inhaling deeply.

* * *

 **((#=x=#))**

When I woke only a few short hours later, I felt suspiciously well rested for having snuck out to bear witness to a coven infighting and subsequently to a _fucking castle_ to be proposed to. That, and having had some wild sexcapades in the master bedroom and en suite of said castle.

"G'mornin', little dove." I turned in my cocoon of blankets to face the cool body spooning me. "Sleep well?" he asked with that knowing, cocky smirk that honestly made my insides quiver and heart rate climb through the roof.

"Better than I ever have," I smiled, replying sincerely as no one else had the empath cheat to give you the most restful sleep possible even if you barely slept at all including, of course, myself in my past life. It was an incredible kind of contentment to sleep deeply and wake up feeling so well rested and ready to face the day, one I'd rarely experienced before in either lifetime.

"I'm glad," the returning warm smile of unquestionable adoration should honestly be illegal. He brushed cool lips against mine before reappearing by my window in a blink. "I'll be back soon to give you a ride to school."

School was...so utterly ordinary that it made last night's events seem all the more surreal, especially as Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmet had already graduated. Sitting with Angela at lunch, it wasn't difficult to note the new tension between Edward and Bella. I tried my best not to think of it though, or look in their direction as his attitude towards my sister was slowly but steadily raising my protective sibling rage and there was nothing I could do to stop the hurt she was going to feel because changing the mind of Assward was _impossible_.

Being picked up by Jasper at the end of the day was a balm to my temper and easily lifted my spirits back to the same state of elation they'd been in earlier this morning. I continued to ride that high as he passed the way to my house and continued on even past his own, growing more and more excited as he drove the path I recognized even in the entirely different light of day. The difference in light alone was staggering towards everything I'd only caught glimpses of in the moonlight. Seeing the not so miniaturized castle with four towers and moat again, I couldn't help but reiterate what I'd said the first time I'd seen it.

"You built a _literal castle_ in seven months," I whispered in awe as the sunlight reflected beautifully off the stained glass windows I knew looked into the throne/ballroom where he proposed to me. "You _lunatic_." I shook my head of the awe for a moment as I turned to a very amused Jasper. "Not that I mind, obviously, but why'd you bring me back?"

He only shrugged in reply, the action far, far too casual. "I just thought you might want to look around a little more into what I hope to make our home in the future, at least one of them; the first one at least."

I tried and failed miserably to keep the implications of his statement from hitting me with all those feels right in my soul. Fuck, it's not like I needed it anyway. "Okay," I croaked out unevenly, huffing when he only chuckled at my ever fluctuating moods and wrapped an intimate arm around my waist.

"Truth is I just didn't want ya around those two while Masen is actin' the way he is and Isabella being...Isabella," he confessed, stroking my hair soothingly when I stiffened at the reminder. "Oh, darlin' no," he soothed upon feeling the welling guilt at being so happy when I knew my sister was drowning in fear and soon to be lost to misery. "You ain't got nothin' to feel sorry for. Just because Masen's decision is makin' your sister miserable, doesn't mean you're not allowed to be happy. Don't do that to yourself, little dove, nothing you could have done would have changed his mind, you _know_ that."

"I do," I pressed myself flat against him, rubbing my cheek into his chest. "I'm sorry, Jazz. I really am so stupidly happy despite surrounding circumstances."

"And that's exactly why I brought you here," his chuckle vibrated pleasantly through me as he oh so casually scooped me up into his arms. "Instead of needlessly worrying about circumstances you can't change, we could better spend that time exploring the castle, working on filling up your new scrapbook, taking more candid photos or pictures of the scenery. _Or_ ," his voice dropped down to a sensual purr, "if you like, we could begin christening more than just our bedroom and en suite.. Maybe we could start with the chaise in the ballroom?"

"...the one you proposed to me on?" I breathed in rising excitement.

"The very same," he returned with a throaty chuckle that I swear travelled straight to my fucking womb.

"What are we waiting for!" I beamed enthusiastically, securing my arms around his neck and one hand in his addictingly soft hair.

* * *

The next school day was just as uneventful as the last and once it was over, Jasper took me straight to our quaint little castle home again, this time between looking over all the scrapbooks I'd kept up since I was four and answering a few curious questions from Jasper about my past life, we 'christened' every inch of the game room and library and the adjoining bathrooms for both. Though the questions did take me a bit by surprise, especially as he didn't seem to ask any very detailed questions.

For example, in the game room: "Did you have any pets before? I know you told me you've owned a rat and beta fish as a child in Phoenix."

It was clear he meant _before_ this life so I answered honestly. "Since I was a toddler in my last life, I have memories of pet dogs. The first I remember was a St. Bernard that died in a car accident when he wandered into the street, then a cairn terrier mix, other terrier mixes, a bichon mix. At some point we even had a couple rabbits, and in my teenage years I bought myself beta fish. After our last dog died in early adulthood, our family swore off any more pets. Too much investment, both monetary and emotional, to deal with anymore."

"Did _you_ want a dog after that, though?"

"Desperately," I admitted quietly. "There wasn't a time I could remember being without that unconditional love and comfort and I wanted it again, but stuck in a job I hated that took up most of my time with minimum wage, I couldn't bring myself to pick some poor puppy that I'd leave alone the majority of everyday and barely be able to provide for. And now...I still love dogs, heck all animals, but I feel like I've lost the ability to form anything more than a shallow attachment with any animal." I paused then to gather my thoughts. "While I still feel an echo of that yearning, the need died along with my past life. After all," I smiled brightly at him, "it's nothing compared to the blessings I have now."

He kissed me passionately then and somehow we migrated to the library, one that almost looked straight out of Beauty and the Beast. After thoroughly *ehem* exploring there and settling in one of the many cozy nooks available, he moved onto more unobtrusive questions.

"Are there any hobbies you had then that you don't now?" After a pause, he added, "and do you miss doing them?"

"I actually have more hobbies now than I ever did then because I just went for so many things I'd always wanted to do after realizing I had a second chance," I mused as I thought of my eclectic collection of pastimes. "But there are a few that didn't carry over, now that you mention it...I had just gotten into embroidery and calligraphy before the accident. And I had only just started looking into making and brewing tea properly and flower arrangement, specifically the philosophy behind ikebana." I felt myself going miles away as I reminisced on all the things I hadn't realized I left behind. "I also liked to keep a lot of potted plants in my room. I'd been growing red anthurium, a gardenia, and some aloe vera and succulents. When I lived somewhere with a bigger yard, I even tried my hand a growing baby tomatoes since I'd always wanted to try growing a big garden."

"Anything else?" he encouraged softly, a fond smile on his face as his fingers stroked mindless patterns on my naked back.

I felt my cheeks heat a little as I confessed to the last few hobbies I hadn't really brought with me, albeit without intending to.

"I really like jigsaw puzzles and...collecting things."

"You already collect things now," he pointed out curiously. "Earrings, feathers, rocks, wood for carving, books, art."

"I liked to collect music boxes," I started slowly, "hand bells..." I trailed off.

"...and?" his lips quirked up, obviously amused at my strange reluctance.

"And stuffed animals," I mumbled into his chest, "especially the big, super soft kind."

He laughed outright at the unwilling confession. "Is that all? Little dove, that ain't nothin' to be embarrassed of. Just imagining you in a pile of stuffed animals bigger than you are is too precious for words!"

"Stop it!" I smacked his arm multiple times and refused to look up after that.

* * *

The third morning after my sister and I's birthday, I woke with the unpleasant surprise of a vision. What kind of vision you might ask? Why one of _Edward Shitmouth Dickbrain Masen_ going through my room to leave no traces of Jasper's existence when he and I weren't there. My birthday presents, the pressed flowers I made from every wild bouquet he brought me after a hunt, all the dreamcatchers I made from feathers he'd painstakingly cleaned and gathered for me, the leather sketchbooks and journals and albums he'd made for me, all the books he'd bought me, _my fucking promise rings_ that I'd left in a small wood box on my dresser, one he'd carved for me with a dove on the top, after I'd taken to hiding my engagement ring on a long necklace under my clothes.

Something resembling a cross between a feral snarl and a shriek of frustration left my clenched teeth as I angrily called the pathetic virgin fuckboy. The plastic of my flip phone gave ominous sounds at my grip when the call went straight to voicemail. A cold hand over mine had me unwillingly loosening my grip as I waited for the end of the damn beep.

" _Edward Anthony Masen Jr.,"_ I started with an enraged hiss. "Don't you fucking _dare_ take even one _glance_ in the direction of my room you _craven halfwit little **milksop**_!"

I slammed down on the end button with a growl that changed to a strangled gasp as another vision temporarily blinded me, this time _Bella_ being the one to raid my room - much less discreetly and considerately, I might add - in search of evidence that the Cullens were a part of our lives beyond the words Bella herself wrote in her album.

"What'd ya see, precious?" he murmured soothingly into my neck, making me aware that he'd shifted us into a sitting position, though he was still spooning me, rubbing soothing circles over my middle with his thumbs as I eased back to the present reality.

"How soon can you move everything connected to you out of my room?" I firmly asked instead.

"I could do that today long before I need to pick ya back up from school again," he answered readily. "Do ya need me to?"

"Please," I whispered, hating how it came out half pleading. "Unfortunately, it seems the circumstances call for such dramatic measures."

"Speaking of," he began slowly. " 'Craven halfwit little milksop'?" was repeated with a little upward twitch of his lips.

"I might get a...bit Shakespearean with my insults when I'm...especially peeved.

"A bit," he repeated incredulously. " _Peeved?_ " The second repetition is what had him laughing. "Guess I should be thankful I've never seen ya really angry if that was only a taste!"

"Yeah, hysterical," I groused in good nature, mood lifting just from seeing my Jasper so open and carefree.

Assured that my things would soon be safe thanks to Jasper, I didn't bother seeking Edward out at school, the two of us ignoring each other as we have been since 'the incident'. Admittedly, it was irritating that he was ignoring me today in particular considering he _had_ to have heard my voicemail, but what could I expect from a little bitch? The glare that thought earned me from across the cafeteria was truly beautiful and the highlight of my school day.

* * *

It was with this slowly growing sense of dread that Jasper drove me one more time to the excessively large home he made for us before he had to leave. Thankfully he did a good job distracting me from the scene I knew was going on with Bella and Edward by creatively confining me in our master bedroom with his mind-blowing skills in the sheets that had me knocked out until I got a frantic call from Dad about my missing sister.

"You'll have to go alone. The whole town 'knows' that we all left shortly after I picked you up from school," Jasper whispered his explanation into my neck, arms firm around my waist as I hesitated to get in the car.

"But you'll be with me tonight?" I stated more than asked, knowing our plan, but I needed the reassurance.

"I'm not gonna miss the chance to have you wake up in my arms one last time," he promised, brushing his lips against mine as he released his hold on me.

"I'll miss you," I teased softly as I started the car.

"Not more than I will, precious," Jasper returned with a grin.

Honestly, I needed that last smile to fortify me as I'd returned to what looked like quite the fiasco as I pulled into the driveway next to Dad's cruiser.

"Maddy! I'm so glad you're okay!" I sighed indulgently as I returned Dad's fierce hug.

"I'm not the one that's missing, Dad," I smiled weakly as he pulled back to properly check if I was really okay. "You said she left a note?"

"Yeah, said she was going to take a walk in the woods with Edward, the trail behind the house," he scowled as he said Masen's name. "Do you think he had anything to do with this? Your Jasper seems like a solid guy, from the talks I've had with him, but I never saw much of the Cullen's youngest or talked to him much even after he and Bella started dating."

"No, Dad, as much as I hate to admit it since I never really liked them together either, Edward would probably kill himself before he'd hurt Bella," I managed to get out with only a grimace at having to defend the little milksop to my Dad.

"Are you so confident in him, Maddy?" I groaned quietly at the new, unfortunately familiar voice that popped up behind me.

"Uncle Billy," I turned with a put upon sigh at spotting him with, surprise surprise, Sam Uley beside him. "Ah, and you brought the temporary alpha of course," I nodded to him in greeting, ignoring how the two tensed at the label I gave him, boring holes into me with their gaze.

"Not that I'm not happy to see you, Billy, but is there a reason you're here?" My head jerked to Dad at hearing the almost hostile greeting he gave his friend.

"We may have had a few recent disagreements, Charlie, but that doesn't mean I've stopped caring for you or your family," He looked pointedly at me when saying the last, only getting him a scowl that he shook his head at before turning his attention back to Dad. "I came to offer help. Sam and his friends know the forests around here better than anyone. I'm sure they can find Isabella."

"After you constantly crucifying the Cullens, Jasper and Edward especially after they started dating my girls you want to offer to help? And from what I've heard of those boys you're talking about from Maddy and Jacob! You think I want them out there and finding her alone and who knows in what condition?!" Charlie shouted.

"Dad, no!" I latched onto his arm when he took a step towards Uley, who looked all too ready to 'defend' himself. "Yeah, they have tempers and have excessively skewed opinions, but they wouldn't do anything to Bella, and...Billy _is_ right about Uley and his pack of jerks knowing the forests better than anyone...at least since the Cullens left."

Both Charlie and Billy scowled when Sam sneered in response to the dig, only Billy nudging him bringing a more neutral expression to the pseudo alpha's face.

"If Maddy says that you'll help then I won't stop you," he looked sharply at Billy then. "But don't think for a second that even if you find Bella, I'll suddenly forget everything you've said or implied about my girls!"

"I understand, Charlie. I'm not expecting anything in return for this. Just letting me help you now is enough."

It was actually really unnerving to see how much their friendship had deteriorated without my realizing, and to have it be because of who Bella and I are dating? I don't think it was nearly this bad in the books. Was it because there were two humans dating vampires that Billy was apparently more insistent on convincing Charlie to have us break up? Was it the closer relationship I had with both him and Dad when I was younger? Whatever the case, it was obvious Uncle Billy fucked up one too many times for Dad.

"If you're going to join in the search for your sister, I recommend that you go with me or one of the others that are going to volunteer from La Push," Sam addressed me with a no nonsense tone, as if expecting me to recklessly go out searching for her and- _with one of his pack?!_

His expression was much less certain upon seeing just how quickly my expression morphed to deep anger, my nostrils flaring as I took in a sharp breath, ready to tear him a new one.

"Maddy is staying _home_ ," Charlie growled, shocking me by putting me half behind him and glaring angrily at Sam who looked stupidly surprised. "Having one of my daughters out in those woods who knows where is one too many." His expression turned more pleading as he turned to address me. "Please?" he asked quietly.

"I'm staying," I assured, smiling a bit when he sighed in relief.

"I see," Billy gave a long sigh. "I'll call the others so they can begin searching."

Ignoring him, Dad turned fully to me. "Sweetie, I'm going to head out again to look. Hopefully I'll be back with Bella."

"Try not to worry too much, Dad. She'll be home safe soon, I'm sure of it," I assured him, blinking when I thought I saw stark relief cross his features before he hugged me.

"If you're saying so, then I believe it." My breath caught at his statement, the implication behind it, but before I could think too hard on it, he had already let go and went to join the small group of volunteers that had gathered in front of the house. Now all that was left to do was wait for the news that Bella was found.

* * *

It was 1:32am when Sam returned with Bella catatonic in his arms, repeating 'he's gone' under her breath like a loon. The dead fish gaze she had was more unsettling than I expected, seeing absolutely nothing.

Soon enough, Dad took her inside and had a doctor look her over, taking in all her weak replies to their questions. Once they were finished, I approached as if nearing a frightened animal.

"Why don't we get you upstairs for a nice hot shower, huh Bella?" I murmured soothingly, deeply unsettled but not letting it show at how she simply didn't respond, simply allowing me to guide her as I gently directed her to taking a quick wash. Going through the motions, I thought. Everything she did looked mechanical and from an outsider's perspective, her actions looked all the more unnatural and unhealthy than they ever seemed in book or movie.

Silently I followed as Bella returned to the living room rather than her own bed and settled on the couch, barely noticing that most of the volunteers and others had left our house empty once more.

"Do you want me to stay with you tonight, Bell-Bell?" I asked quietly as I put another blanket over her. "It'll be like a sleepover. We could even build a pillow fort like we used to, if you're up for it," I tried. Having closer support around her than Dad this time around has to make some kind of difference right? I'm her twin sister. We may not have been as close recently as we had been in Phoenix, but a lifetime of love and support can't be so easily forgotten, can it?

Minutes passed like a small eternity as she failed to respond to me at all, like she hadn't even heard me. Like I wasn't even there. I stiffened when I felt a hand on my shoulder, only to relax when I saw it was Dad.

"Why don't you go up and get a few hours of sleep, Maddy?" he offered as he helped me up. "I can watch over her for the rest of the morning."

"Okay..." My lip quivered when he hugged me at the sound of my weak reply.

"I love you, baby girl," he whispered gruffly into my hair and I had to _bite_ my lip to stop it from shaking, and to keep the tears at bay. Leave it to Dad not to placate me with false platitudes about how Bella didn't mean it and to understand her situation and let it go.

"Love you too, Dad." I kissed him on the cheek when he pulled back, before I headed up to my room. Gratitude and relief and affection washed over me when I opened the door and got swept into Jasper's arms.

"Feels like Masen broke your sister," he muttered into my hair as he picked me up and took me to bed. I huffed, lips twitching involuntarily at the statement.

"That's not funny," I retorted moodily, allowing him to change my clothes and slip me under the covers.

"You still laughed," he pointed out with a kiss to my hair.

"I shouldn't have."

"She's not in a good place right now," he whispered as he pulled me flush against him, "and it feels like she's not going to be for a while. There's _nothing_ you can do or could have done, sister or not."

I didn't answer, burying my face in his chest. My feelings were likely answer enough.

"Don't think about any of that, little dove," he began humming a gentle tune. "Sleep for now."

Blearily, my lids cracked open on hearing quite the racket somewhere in my room. They popped _wide_ open upon realizing Bella was all but _trashing my room_. Right, I _literally_ saw this coming and it still took me by surprise. Typical.

"Bella, what the hell are you doing?!" I whisper shouted upon realizing it wasn't even four in the morning and Bella had all but chucked yet another of my books to the floor. I jerked back, startled, when she rounded on me faster than I thought she was capable of moving.

"You knew they would leave! You knew he'd abandon me, take everything!" She shouted at me in a volume not at all appropriate for this hour. Distantly, I heard the telltale signs that she'd startled Dad awake. "Where is it?!"

"Where is what?" I didn't realize I was backing away from her until my back hit the headboard of my bed, just wanting to get away from that crazed look in her eyes.

"All of it!" She practically spat in my face. "All of the things he's ever given me! The presents they gave me! Even the stuff Jasper gave you! You have to be hiding it somewhere!"

"Bella, calm down! I'm not hiding any of your stuff! I didn't take anything!" I was equal parts furious and terrified upon seeing the mess she made of my room and how unhinged she looked at the moment, truly tense from the possibility that she could physically attack me in this state.

"What on earth is going on?!" Dad burst through the door, only to freeze upon taking in the scene of Bella still tearing apart my room like a savage and me all but cowering in my bed. "Isabella Marie Swan, you stop destroying your sister's room this instant?! What is _wrong_ with you?!"

"But Ch-Dad! She's hiding it all! I know she is!"

"Enough! Maddy doesn't take one step into your room unless you're there!" He hoisted her up by her arm, firm but gentle, pulling her away from my things and closer to the door. "Now I won't pretend that I know what you're going through right now, but _nothing_ justifies your actions and behavior towards your sister, especially not at _3:54_ _in the morning._ "

Bella stilled and seemed to slowly, very slowly, absorb what Dad said, only to collapse to the floor like a puppet whose strings were cut. I didn't even know that was a thing people did in reality, all the more unsettling for it to happen right in front of me. It was like all the fight and life had drained out of her, her expression going back to that vacant, dead fish look.

"W-we should get her to bed," I managed to whisper into the shocked silence that followed Bella's sudden collapse.

"Right." Seeing the utterly lost and heartbroken expression on Dad's face, I couldn't help the tiny prick of resentment towards Bella that nestled deep in my chest for putting him through this and all the pain she had yet to cause him in the next few months.

* * *

The next time I woke up was infinitely more comfortable, perfect as it always was when I woke up in Jasper's arms. I sighed softly as I felt his fingers brushing over my face, my brows, my cheeks, my lips.

" _Stay, O sweet, and do not rise; The light that shines comes from thine eyes*'*,_ " my breath caught as I realized what it was he was reciting.

" _The day breaks not, it is my heart because that you and I must part._ " I swallowed with difficulty around the lump that rose to my throat. " _Stay, or else my joys will die and perish in their infancy._ "

" _'Tis_ _true, 'tis day; what though it be? O, wilt thou therefore rise from me?_ " My arms tightened around him at the thought of getting up, his own responding in kind.

" _Why should we rise because 'tis light? Did we lie down, because 'twas night? Love, which in spite of darkness brought us hither, should in despite of light keep us together_." His lips brushed over my brown, my eyes, my nose, my cheeks, my lips.

" _Light hath no tongue, but is all eye; If it could speak as well as spy, this were the worst that it could say, that being well I fain would stay, and that I loved my heart and honor so, that I would not from you, that had them, go._ " The tears that I had struggled to stop since I woke escaped and ran down my face.

"I don't want you to go," I confessed hoarsely, not willing to open my eyes to the traitorous light of day.

"I'll be back as soon as I can," he promised, burying his face in my neck and breathing deeply. "But until then, every second away from you will be a fresh form of torture." I giggled wetly at that.

"I'll be counting the minutes until you return," I teased lightly, finally daring to open my eyes and meeting his warm ochre gaze.

"See you soon, little dove," a whisper of a kiss to my lips, a heartbeat later, and I was alone, so very alone, in my room.

* * *

AN: Happy Valentine's Day! Even if it's a day late, sorry I spent it working and doing some final tweaks before I posted. I figured this chapter deserved the release date what with the proposal and all. As you can tell, it's a very long chapter and there's a few hidden details here and there, so if anyone wants clarification or has questions you know I'd be happy to receive them. A few things I need to note; I've posted the pictures that inspired the castle, along with a playlist I made inspired by Maddy and Jasper, on my tumblr 'madsper' for anyone interested in that, though the playlist is only available to those with a spotify account. I mentioned in the post that if I get enough requests to anyone curious enough I'd post a list of the songs and their artists so there's that. Another thing, I honestly feel like the castle bit is, like, super excessive and passes my own willing suspension of disbelief, but my editor friend was okay with it and speaking in-story, it's not that far-fetched as the wealth Jasper has alone is probably just unimaginable to me; I literally cannot fathom. I'd like to think this castle shit he pulled is just a very in your face display of that wealth and his enamor with Maddy so I chose not to scrap the idea. I will say that Jasper had help in building the castle, and it wasn't anyone in the Cullen family as none of them are aware of its existence. The next chapter is where the story will _really_ deviate from canon and I'm sure a lot of you might not be happy with it, but as this was started mostly for my editor friend, I won't take offense or mind if you choose to stop reading. As always, thank you for reading and reviews are always welcome. No promises for when the next chapter will be out, but hopefully it won't take more than a year like this one did. Until next time!

*Some of you might have caught the reference to a supernatural/romance teen _book_ by the same title. _Blood and Chocolate_ by Annette Curtis Klause which, ironically enough is about werewolves. A bit cringey for my tastes even when I first read it in high school but I still bought my own copy and recommend it. Funnily enough, the same author does have a vampire story called _The Silver Kiss_ , but after reading an excerpt of it I lost interest in it entirely because I'm stupidly picky about everything, but I'm sure some of you would enjoy it if you haven't read them already! Just a warning, do _not_ watch the film. It's only laughably, loosely based on the book. It just used the character's names and the werewolf idea and maybe _some_ info from the book, but it was honestly twisted almost beyond recognition. Terrible movie - 0/10.

**I'm assuming the title of _Blood and Chocolate_ came from the novel _Steppenwolf_ by Herman Hesse as the quote containing the title is included in said book before the story starts. No recommendations here unless you're just that curious as it's a bit, uh, deep and dark with heavy concepts and such, but this is just a short explanation as to why Jasper thought this novel was what she meant. Makes sense he'd know an old German novel rather than a new-ish teen romance novel.

*' Straight from wiki - _"In architecture, a **chimera** or **grotesque** is a fantastic or mythical figure used for decorative purposes. Chimerae are often described as gargoyles, although the term gargoyle technically refers to figures carved specifically as terminations to spouts which convey water away from the sides of buildings."_ Thought this was an interesting fact when I was looking for necessary decoration for Jasper's ridiculous castle.

'* Raison d'être - the most important reason or purpose for someone or something's existence. Because I'm trash who can't help but lay the cheese on extra thick.

*'* Break of Day by John Donne(1572-1631). I'll post it all together on madsper, but it's in its entirety above, just broken into a dialogue.


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